Recently a friend asked me how he could support me this lifetime?
This question took me by surprise as I have never had such a question posed to me. It took me several days and his constant inquiry for me to answer. I am a very independent person and I have a false belief that states I can do it all myself. I really had to think about this quest, how can someone support me, this was such a foreign concept to my mind that I spent three days angsting over all the possibilities.
It was a great question yet I had no answer!
I am used to walking alone in this life and all of a sudden someone wants to support me? What? What would this mean, would I have to give up something to allow someone’s support? My own continuous inquiry of this question was relentless and took my mind in so many different directions.
On the second day after breakfast, he again asked and said he needed an answer…I responded out of nowhere that I needed a teacher and a mentor. I wondered where this request came from, but it made perfect sense as I have been looking for a teacher and mentor who could love me for who I am yet expand me beyond all dimensions.
The remainder of the day I thought about what this could possibly mean….it has been a dream of mine to find a mentor who understands me, sees me and could help me break all illusions. I kept thinking that I had finally found someone who could fulfill this role…or did I? This kept roaming around in my mind and then I heard a bold voice say, why didn’t you just ask for a God, that is what you are really looking for.
What? Geeze…. where does this stuff come from, I wondered? A God, I asked? A vision flashed through my mind of a time when we were creator Gods right alongside of the one and only God. Then my ego came in and disrupted the beautiful sight and feeling of a love so pure and light that it brought tears to my eyes, and I heard, like anyone can fulfill that role!
The next morning I told my friend I really needed a God….his expression surprised me and he commented with, “finally!” We did not speak of it again.
Much to my surprise, this quest was not focused outside of myself. Rather, I spent the rest of the day daydreaming about what it would be like to be free from this shell of a human body as that is my representation of what being God means. No constraints of language, or energy form, or food, or water, or anything. Just pure freedom, capable of deep experiences of love and peace yet incapable of experiencing lack.
I know at a conscious level I deserve to be loved and I deserve to love …..all at the level of which I desire. Even though I live in a world of duality I should not have to experience the duality if I choose, after all this is humanities free will. If I choose not to experience duality and the illusion that I am separate from my Godself then I deserve a God. I laughed to myself as if that could even be a possibility in this so-called reality and wondered what I really meant by I deserve a God?
I wondered what life would be like if I experienced myself without holding anything back: freedom, deep love, peace, joy…….the emotions kept coming alongside the tears. There was a deep understanding in every single cell of my existence that the God I seek resides within me, because only I can fulfill such a wish.
My connection with my Godself is my one truth of all the worlds. I need my god self because I am the one true person who knows me, sees me and understands me. Only my connection with myself can fulfill why I need a God, because once I have that, I am connected with God, whole in God and one with God!
I was lying in bed one morning wondering what the day would bring…..when the thought came over me, “Why am I here?”
How many of you have been asking this very question?
When I am amid transition/ascension, this question comes into my energy more than I care to acknowledge. Why? Because transitions or ascension phases are meant to expand us, to create awareness’s and to move us to a new action. The question comes into our awareness to expand our consciousness, to bring our thoughts, emotions, and actions into our everyday patterns of awareness. This allows for the old belief systems to change with grace and ease rather than fighting against them creating illness, anxiety or depression.
This is my first sign of awareness…..when this question comes into my energy field, it is my soul’s way of saying there is a transition coming, get ready!
The following are 3 questions I ask myself to help me move through the process with grace and ease. I ask them daily and sometimes multiple times during a day. Why? Because I do NOT enjoy pain and suffering so I safeguard to guarantee grace and ease.
Who am I?
I try to ask this question daily, mainly because I am not the same person as I was yesterday. If I feel I am the same person as I was yesterday then I know I am stuck in a loop, a loop of emotions, thoughts, beliefs and actions. One way to get out of the loop is to ask the question.
What do I really want to create?
Creation is for the self. I am the creator of my life, not a victim, without regrets, just me being responsible for all my thoughts, actions, emotions and beliefs. With this acknowledgment, I know that what I create, I can un-create if it really is not serving me. If I create an illness, I know I can un-create it. If I create a relationship issue, I can un-create that as well.
What is the result? Am I doing this for myself or someone else?
Seeing the big picture of my creation is the key. I always focus on what the result of my creation will be and who it will be for. All my creations are for me, because I am the only one I control and have full responsibility for. If my end result is for someone else, I do not create it because they are responsible for their life. I would be taking their power away from them if I imposed my creation onto them. My result is always for self-expansion and sometimes I take a wrong turn. All of which I know I am responsible for and can easily un-create what does not serve my soul’s path.
We are in times of ascension, there is no certain place to go to, no one-way route to ascension of the body and soul.
I am at the point in my life where a job is not fulfilling, creating a business involves a ton of marketing, many hours spent working endlessly towards a perceived idea of success and to accumulate money. I sit in a small 10 X 10 room I call my office, this is where all the magic happens, creative workshops, mastermind thoughts, podcasts and meditations for others.
Yet, today and most days I crave for something more, something that involves deep experiences of growth and evolutionary downloads that will change the face of humanity. It is this yearning that keeps me alive.
Today, like most days are spent trying to talk myself into greatness. Hell, I have post it note after post it notes filled with inspiration, love quotes and motivation, all of which I would rather not read today, yet I read through them looking for the magic pill to take away these deep cravings for more. Today, it dawned on me what my real craving is….to create life with people who desire the same experiences that I do. To create life with deep emotions, deep expansion into the unknown and unseen. Deep conversations that leave me wondering about everything and fill me up at the same time.
I know on a conscious level that I deserve, desire and try to create this everyday….yet the yearning for more never ends. I constantly ask, Why? Why do I yearn for more? Why am I so inquisitive? Why can’t I just be happy? Yet, every cell in my body is screaming for something I just can’t fulfill. I long for such pure conscious love that I ache with the thought of what that would be like, the vision of it sets me on fire and scares the heck out of me at the same time.
Every thought that runs rampant in my mind says you have everything you need and more….yet I ask what about desire. Is it selfish to desire something different? Is it outside the experience of this lifetime to desire everything this world has to offer and more?
Daily I ask, What is it I desire? Who do I desire to be? I see so many people sharing their strategies of how to be successful, how to break the boundaries of their thoughts, their emotions, their beliefs…..I even teach others to do the same. Yet, today I am vulnerable to my own yearnings and desires.
My yearnings are so persistent and strong that sometimes I feel that my desire will swallow me up one day, never to be seen again within my own self. Today seems to be one of those days where the tears stream down my face with no option of stopping. No matter how I try to distract myself, I continue to feel the gentle tug of what else is possible to explore. I also know that these kinds of days generally mean there is a breakthrough of some kind about to happen, yet, these days are hard on my psyche, on my emotions and on my confidence.
I want to create a life of amazing experiences with others, I want to create partnerships with people where competition does not exist. I want to live everyday with so much expansion that when I lay my head down at night I am exhausted in all the accomplishments of the day. I want to have such deep conversations about everything that I run out of questions to ask.
What I yearn for has nothing to do with material objects, they have everything to do with relationships of love…. deep, deep love. I know at some level of this experience today I am tapping into a consciousness that exists within our human race and I know that some of you can relate and have similar yearnings. So, my quest continues, how can we create this amazing life we dream of?
As a wise old soul once told me, we are not islands, we create consciousness together. I am tired of the same old thing, I am tired of competition, I am tired of religion, politics, hate crimes, discrimination, material possession….the list goes on forever. I am tired!
Again, I ask. How can we create a life so full that we have no desires, no yearnings…. just bliss? The answer comes in a form of a vision, simple be a magnet and allow spirit to come to you. This way of being is in the current programming, yet I understand its function and dynamics. My new craving is to be this magnet, to stop thinking and working so hard that I literally stop the flow.
The new form of question is to “Show me” – show me how to be the magnet and to relax within the new way of being.
AUTHOR: Angela Blaha, Author, Mentor, Lover of Evolution.
I assumed we had evolved beyond the ludicrous belief that we cannot connect with source, cannot feel, hear or see beyond the veil and into the perceived “woo woo” of spirit.But, I was wrong as my latest radio interview still held the energy of disbelief in the self and the power of the soul.
I teach about emotions, thought, beliefs and how they relate to intuition.How our thought forms and belief patterns attach to the fear of our emotions and hold us from mental, emotional and spiritual growth.In fact, I teach people to use Intuition as their thought form rather than the mind/ego because the mind is based in the past while intuition is based in present moment.
During my last radio interview I was explaining to a man how his belief would not allow him to connect to a past loved one because he would not be able to hear the message. He was skeptical and said he did not believe I could talk to someone he lost a long time ago.Everything I said he denied.He left the conversation still in disbelief, as my words were not powerful enough to break down the belief system.Yet it is not the connection to his deceased loved ones that were missing, rather it is his belief, which is attached to emotions of fear, guilt, forgiveness, and even love that holds back the connection.
It is not my or your ability to connect to past loved ones, aliens, ghosts, spirit or even God that is “woo woo”.Rather, it is our unspoken emotions, beliefs and mindless thoughts.
We are programmed to ignore, stuff and hold on tight to our rigid patterns, making them unseen and unspoken.This action creates unfounded and ludicrous beliefs, the direct definition of “woo”.
I believe in infinite possibilities, which allows me to expand the mind.I use intuition as my thought form, constantly trusting my connection with my own soul.In trusting and knowing myself from the inside out it is this evidence of wisdom, of knowing any truth which stops me from blindly following others with such “woo woo” belief systems.
I will trust my intuition, my connection to all that is, before I would trust any other unfounded fearfully based thought form.I trust my soul and all of our wisdom.I will not blindly follow any other belief just because they have been a cultural, familial or religious belief for eons.
Here are 3 question I ask myself to better know and understand my truth.
Is this really my belief?Or does it belong to society? To my family? To religion?
What emotions are attached to this belief and are they really my emotions?Do I really feel this way?
What is my truth?If this isn’t my belief, what is?
I have been asking my soul to bring into my consciousness full remembrance of wisdom and Peru certainly delivered!
Peru is one of the most beautiful, natural and magical places on earth. As my journey began, I remembered so many lifetimes where only pure love existed, a type of love that created a feeling of ecstasy and so much joy. A richness and depth of genuine care, I felt I had left this earth and traveled in time to another dimension. A love where only bliss lived, no worries or anxiety. A time where separation did not exist. I was excited to remember love so pure, something I believed for many years only existed in fairytales, dreams or for the pure romantics, yet I sensed it could exist and I found it in Peru in my memory banks of wisdom. This created a comfort in me that I knew was and still is possible in our world today.
As we traveled through the country, every new place, city or stop by the edge of the road was filled with memories. The beginning of the trip allowed for the rush of pure love, where ancient societies cared for each other in ways beyond my current reality of the human expression of care. Ways that seemed magical as in that time and space, separation did not exist. I remembered the intense emotion of love where every cell in my body was filled with passion, again thinking this depth of love only existed in fairy tales or magic; an emotion so romantic, I once believed only existed in some outer galaxy. Yet, I remembered it existed here on earth, it created a sense of such deep peace within me, a depth I had not experienced before.
As we continued our travel, devastation appeared and swept me from the grasp of love into disbelief, overwhelm and hurt. As I witnessed through remembrance, the time and place where separation entered like a plague, dividing and creating chaos. I remembered the first unconscious killing of another human and how I felt so alone, angry and betrayed. This memory left me with such overwhelm as I could not believe or understand why anyone would choose something other than bliss. I felt such deep, deep hurt, I was beyond devastated, I was heartbroken!
From my heartbreak, I dove into separation, understanding it’s every action, every thought process, every emotion that it created within the human. Lifetime after lifetime I came back diving deeper and deeper into how separation creates doubt, worthlessness, hopelessness and destruction. How, with one tiny vibration of it’s energy, our own love can turn into something vile, and we use our thoughts and emotions not only against others, but against ourselves. My quest was to know separation at the depths that I knew love, and this lifetime is remembering it all so I can help and serve humanity as we are in the midst of the shift of our consciousness to return to the depths of pure conscious love.
The lessons or experiences of separation has lead me back to this point in time and space of remembering pure love. This pure conscious love is what Peru has so kindly reminded me to move back to, how to remember the vibration of pure joy, a feeling beyond separation, beyond the devastation of doubt. A state of pure love so full of emotional bliss, that it creates magic everywhere!
How do we bring this feeling of ecstasy into everyday living was my next quest as we spent many days in the tranquility of the jungle, integrating what we experienced within us. I wanted to know how to bring this ecstatic love energy to you. As our fearless leader of our group expressed over and over, we bring this blissful energy of love into everyday living by paying attention, being very present and experiencing how we feel! Pay attention to how you are, the words you use to describe how you are feeling, the words you use to understand your emotions and thoughts. Pay attention to the details, as the details create and grow your reality. Create something magical everyday that reminds you of the love you are, maybe it’s a note you post to your mirror so you see it everyday. Or maybe it’s a kind gesture you do for someone else. Or maybe it’s the way you lean into your partner to say, “I love you” as you send the vibration of unconditional love. Or maybe it’s the way you dance, to free your spirit and allow your inner God or Goddess to come out and play. Maybe you walk in the rain and remember how you used to splash in the mud puddles as a child. Just do something that allows the remembering of your love, your essence!
I know I have spoken on this subject before, but Peru has reminded me of how magical pure love is and it is my quest to move this magic within you, to a new level. We have to bring pure love into our everyday living, we no longer have excuses, as the intent of the shift we are experiencing is creating the new earth and this depth of pure conscious love. We are the new earth, you and I and it is our responsibility to create this kind of magic that we are! Empower yourself and the people in your life to love without conditions and intolerance, be very clear about your essence as this is your purpose. How do we practice pure love? By practicing tolerance, detachment from materialism and being unconditional love. We are human and we will fall away from our essence, yet this is not a reason to be hard on ourselves. Simply and gently remind yourself of your love!
Create romance in every relationship, speak your truth with passion, allow your emotions to be seen. When we are seen, we are no longer lonely!