by Angela Blaha | Sep 19, 2015 | Communication, Emotions, energy, Featured Events, Intuition, Positive Psychology, Soul, Spiritual, starseed, Wellness
Remembering who I am at the core is much more difficult than I had anticipated. I am not a patient person and so when I ask for something I want it immediately. I know I am not alone in this pursuit of immediate response, as I know you can relate.
I have learned that the remembering of love and healing comes slowly, or at least more slowly than what I want. It seems to come when I least expect it and when it comes it either comes brutally or so very kind and gentle. Either way it comes I usually get the point!
For instance I recently had a remembering when I was in Colorado. I remembered I had brought people to a sacred place in the mountains to heal. I thought I was doing a good thing, but the people I brought there apparently had an alternative motive and destruction was a part of their plan. When I remembered what had happened my emotions became carried away with my perceived actions, creating a sense in me that I had done something wrong. My perception was that Mother Earth, in its alignment with galaxies beyond this one could help heal people and their habitual patterns. What I did not take into consideration was people’s willingness to allow healing to take place. I also learned that fear will override even the best of intentions.
Since this experience in Colorado I have learned that many people really enjoy being or believing that they are victims, that what happens to them is totally out of control. They allow fear to play games with their internal wisdom, what they know deep down within them to be their truth. Creating all kinds of scenarios which are linked to past perceptions, patterns and belief systems creating a false sense of who they are.
As a starseed I know and understand that everything is within our control and that we are responsible for our thoughts, actions, words, etc. We are responsible for our own remembering of who we are at our core. In my book: Show Me How to Remember My Power through Self-love and Forgiveness”, St. Germaine reminds us to love ourselves unconditionally, no matter what we remember.
I do know for certain that I am love!
I do remember how amazing pure love is and I feel it when I channel. Sometimes it is so mesmerizing that I do not want to return from this state of being pure love as I know within my being that that feeling is what a starseed is. Pure love is the core of who we are as well as every other being, but at times I want so desperately to return to that pure love as I know it is where I belong. When I am in the moment of pure love, with the wisdom of this essence, I am home, home is not a place where I go to, rather it is a place of being.
When I remember that I am a being of love the whole dynamic of who I am changes, my response to people change, my perception about events change, the way I walk even changes. I do remember the energy of love and that is really what a starseed in a human body means to me. It does not matter what human functions I can do, rather it is a form of being.
by Angela Blaha | Sep 12, 2015 | Emotions, energy, Intuition, Soul, Spiritual, starseed
Wow!!!
I cannot believe I would label this blog with such rules as to define a starseed. We have no definition; rather we have similarities, all of which can change in a split second to something different.
If you search the Internet there are a multitude of definitions, quizzes and articles.
What I can say with certainty of a starseed is this.
I am not from Earth!
I do not feel a deep connection to earth, however I sympathize with her and what she has gone through as a planet. When I connect to her I feel her pain and suffering. I see the bloodshed, the torture and the destruction. I also see and feel how beautiful she is with her majestic abilities to create such beautiful scenes. I feel her wanting to create harmony, peace and to heal. I feel compassion for you Mother Earth and I bring you much love!
With this inner wisdom of knowing, I am not from here, I feel like there is so much information that I should be able to access. I become highly frustrated with this inner knowing and sometimes demand a clear understanding as why it is not at my beck and call. I instinctly know that I and you have the ability to access cosmic, spiritual and love energies and I believe in my being that I should be able to do so at any given time I desire.
So what is my holdup? I have searched this world and many of the people who mentor me why I cannot access this information. All I hear is either one of two answers. Why would I want such information, or all will be revealed in divine timing.
I call bullcrap!
I am a starseed who, like everyone else on this planet has access to everything. Source does not hold secrets or keep thing hidden! I just haven’t figured out how to access this Galactic/Spiritual Akashic field yet, which is my desire and goal to do by the end of this year.
As a spirit in a human body I intuitively know that we have access to the remembering of who we are. If we want all the entire gamete of information all at once or just pieces of the info, that is up to us.
When I am asked why I would even want the remembering of everything? My answer to this question is, why not? Why wouldn’t I want this information, this information for me means there is no more separation. No separation between Source and myself or anything else. It would mean what I know to be my truth that I am one with the cosmos. Who doesn’t want this information? This is my return question, and maybe I am alone in this quest but I know there is so much more and I want it all. This is very powerful stuff and if I can remember the beautiful love energy that resides at my core why wouldn’t I want this wisdom, not to mention the overwhelming emotion of pure love that I get a glimpse of when I channel.
I do not know what my holdup to accessing this information is right now, but I do feel like it will come soon, in the mean time I will continue to meditate and to ask for the remembering. And I will continue to call bullcrap as the innate being I am knows there in infinite possibilities and tapping into those possibilities is a life changer.
As a starseed or just plain ol human being I refuse to stay within the definitions of what I am suppose to be – I will conquer the wisdom in this lifetime or die trying!
by Angela Blaha | Sep 6, 2015 | Uncategorized
As a woman growing up in the Midwest, I was taught that it was important to wear the right clothes, to eat the right foods, to be kind, to go to church and wear your best dress, not to speak up for what I believed or what I thought.
All of these rules are so out of alignment with who I really am. Yet, I went along with the rules so not to be tooooo far out of the norm that I was totally isolated from society which basically told me what to do, how to speak and what to wear. A total stripping down or programming of who I came to this beautiful earth to be.
What a bunch of crap!
Through out my entire life there has been this calling to be something different from the rules. The love I hold within is sometimes so overwhelming that if I were to unleash it it just may override the entire world within which we live and then I would be to blame for the destruction of the world, as we know it. I laugh to myself at how ridiculous this may sound, but the need to be myself is sometimes that overwhelming. My need to be who I came to earth to be is not what society expects me to be. And the courage it takes to be original is at times extremely overwhelming making it easy to hide from the backlash.
I am not a bra burning women’s right enthusiast; rather I am an enthusiasm of being original. What that really means is still yet to come, because every minute of everyday we create something new, something original.
I am at the point in my life where I can say the hell with society, the hell with the rules. I just want to be free!
The story should end here, but what I know is that my previous programming of being a “good girl” still runs and it is taking some time to change the programming, a sort of struggle that only I control and can change with every moment of time.
So why do I choose to remain within the parameters of the rules? I know I am so much more than what the rules teach; I know I am totally outside the parameters of the rules. I do consider myself an outlier and always have. I knew I was different from most people around me, even my own Mother would tell me it was okay to different. She even saw that I really did not fit within the confines of what and who I was expected to be.
Who am I? I ask myself this question everyday in my meditation and everyday I receive a different answer. And I give thanks that the answer is never the same because then I would be trying to fit into the rules of who I am supposed to be.
When I heard the word starseed, I knew I had finally found the meaning of who I am. What does the word really mean? All I really know about the word is this; with every syllable of the word is a vibration that resounds with every ounce of my being. A definition is a continuous work in progress as I discover new information every day about my starseed heritage.
by Angela Blaha | Aug 20, 2015 | Coaching, Emotions, Intuition, Meditation, Positive Psychology, Soul, Spiritual
I had been anticipating much joy of my recent silent retreat for months, I couldn’t wait to be in silence, to go so deep within myself that I would become lost. This is something I had been craving for a very long time now.
Little did I know it would be so much more than just a simple craving!
I contracted strep throat infection the Friday before I left for my trip, I was so sick. It was the sickest I have been since my college years. My entire throat was white with infection; I ran a fever, headache, etc. I thought seriously about not going to the retreat as I was driving over 13 hours and I really did not want to infect others.
The morning I was scheduled to leave, I again thought I should not go, but I somehow knew and understood that this infection was my body fighting against change. Cell memory that needed to be released and healed yet was so eager to hang on to what it was comfortable with. I made the decision to pack up my clothes and to attend no matter what was trying to stop me, determined to transform even in the face of physical illness.
The first day of the retreat was zen silence, which meant no eye contact along with no talking or writing. Just being with myself. It was perfect, exactly what I was hoping for. There was no need for odd communication of any kind with total strangers. I loved every minute of it.
It was a total stripping down of myself, which was my intent. Strip away what is no longer needed or useful. I spent the day doing a lot of crying, not much thought, just being present with nature and listening to the soul.
The following days were equally as transformative, day two was spent with ridding the body of cell memory done via massage, a Lakota sweat, and lithium hot springs. I felt new again and the body felt much pleasure.
The third day was spent with healing, feeling a familiarity to Crestone, I knew I had been there before in some other life and that I needed to heal the earth and my actions of that lifetime. It all became evident with the remembering of that life and perceived actions of good will, which did not turn out that way. This day was spent with so many blessing and such deep healing with spirit, the land and myself.
Day four and five were filled with rejuvenation, stepping fully into my abilities and demonstrating them. Making new connections with soul family at the retreat and plans for the future.
Many blessings to all of you!
Here is an amazing spirit photo from Crestone!
by Angela Blaha | Aug 7, 2015 | energy, Meditation
Who am I kidding? Transformation is a lot of work, emotions fly everywhere, so many days when you have no idea is happening, feeling lost, feeling stuck, feeling like giving up!
Fortunately we all go through these times….notice I said fortunately. If we did not go through these periods of change we really would be stuck.
Summer is my time for transformation, every summer I spend time in silence and generally around water. Water seems to help me heal and is so calm and flowing, it knows what to wash away and what to bring to the surface.
This year has been no exception and my transformation has been very disruptive and long. It seems that time has flown by, I realize this statement is a cliché, but really this summer for me has disappeared with what I consider to be very little change.
I have found being in transition to be a normal part of my cycle of life in this human being. I talk about transition almost on a daily basis yet what are we really talking about?
When I am moving through a transition there is a period of feeling stuck, not knowing what that really means-feeling stuck, but it is a feeling of not knowing or understanding. Sometimes it may be based in fear of the unknown, it may also be based in high expectations and not sure if I can meet the demands or even want to.
During this time I reach out to others for help to move through the energy a bit faster but this year it seemed to hang on for what seemed to be forever. My old ways of moving through the energy did not seem to help, almost as if the practices held me in my feeling of “being stuck” even longer than usual. So I have been on a mission to create new practices by trial and error. This letting go of what I now consider old practices has opened up many opportunities to expand further than ever expected.
When the period of “feeling stuck” slowly recedes there is a feeling of new joy, this new sense of joy is renewed through glimpses of fantastic ideas, one here and there. This has always been my signal that the transformation is making a turn and that the new energy will soon find its way to a normal way of being.
My deepest finding through this transformation was that my practices were weak and that creating space for the transition to take place was what really worked. Fighting against the transformation only caused more pain, which created a sense of time moving slowly.
When I open my heart and allowed the defragging to take place, that is when time seemed to fly and then understanding and new knowledge emerged. I associated this time with defragging of a computer. In the past I used to defrag my computer, this defragging allowed time for the system to rearrange, to get rid of things that were no longer needed, to upgrade new systems and to re-categorize new and old information. That is what it is like when a period of transformation takes place and how it works.
My biggest take away from this transforming summer is: when your feeling stuck, allow yourself time, open your heart and allow space for the transformation to happen. Stop fighting against it and accept that change is moving in, after all, we are beings in a continuous state of change.
